When it comes to knowing what it takes to be successful, Tracee Ellis Ross has a fountain of experience.
Ross, 53, is an award-winning actress and co-CEO of Pattern Beauty, a haircare company she founded in 2019. She recently sat down with Emma Grede, co-founder and CEO of Good American and host of the Aspire podcast, for an episode titled “Become the CEO of Your Own Life.”
During the hour-long conversation, Ross shared glimpses of her journey to starting her own business and the tools she used to find her true purpose.
“People talk about how to get what you want. I think it’s more important to learn how to be who you are,” she said. “The world around you will be built out of that.”
Here’s how Ross says you can take charge of your life and experience true fulfillment.
Use these 3 tools to ‘become the CEO of your own life’
1. Assess the scope of your dreams
Growing up, Ross watched how her mom, the award-winning entertainer Diana Ross, balanced her career with her personal life. She never missed breakfast with her kids and recorded music at night when they were sleeping, Tracee said.
It showed Ross early on that having big dreams requires putting in equal, or more, effort to maintain them, she explained.
“People always say dream big, but what I learned in my childhood was dream big but know that you’re the one that’s gonna be doing the work,” Ross said.
“Dream at a pace and in a way that you can actually maintain what it takes to do that.”
2. Journal to find your purpose
To better understand what brings you joy and fuels you, Ross suggested journaling and self-reflection.
Each day for one to two weeks, ask yourself these questions:
How was my day today?How did I honor myself?What went well? What didn’t go well?What feels scary about what I’m feeling today? What do I have resentment towards?What do I have gratitude about?
“Then comb back through it with a pen and a highlighter,” Ross said. Circle the words and themes that stand out as most important, and place them on another piece of paper.
“See if you can start asking yourself questions from there. ‘What is the feeling I want from my life, and what things in my life that already exist give me those feelings?'” Ross said.
“‘Is there a job I can build out of that? Is there a life I can build out of that? Is there a company I can build out of that?'”
3. Learn to accept hearing the word, ‘no’
Even when you discover your purpose or land on a great idea, you can still face rejection in your pursuit of it all. For example, it took Ross a decade for Pattern Beauty products to go from her pitch to store shelves, she said.
“I learned a process around no’s that has been instrumental in my entire life, but particularly as a business builder,” Ross said.
“What I learned is, the no, take it in, have the feelings, be disappointed,” she said. “And then once the feelings have subsided and you can actually take it in and learn from it, ask yourself some questions.”
Here are the major questions you should ask yourself after a rejection:
Is the idea not as strong as you think it is?Why do you think they said no if the idea is strong?Are they the wrong person/company to help you bring your vision to life?Did you express yourself in the clearest, most effective way?
“When you answer those questions, you get to get more clear each time. So, every ‘no’ brought me closer,” Ross said.
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